Calm my Stomach

Today I found myself asking God to calm my stomach. Most people pray "Lord, please calm my heart in this difficult situation." I, however, asked God to calm my stomach. When I get anxious about something, my stomach goes haywire. I almost push myself to the point of ...well nevermind.

The reason I needed God to calm my stomach was I was going to take the train all by myself to a large city filled with crime. I won't tell you what city because that's "asking for trouble" as my dear mother would say. My husband was originally supposed to go with me, but he had to work. Story of our lives.

My middle brother, Luke, had a jazz band concert in this large, crime-filled city. So, I couldn't not go. (Did you know that many linguists are advocating for the acceptance of double negatives?) I live 900+ miles away from my family. Luke came here with his high school jazz band as a sort of last hoorah before going to college in the fall. No humane woman would pass up the opportunity to see one of her family members perform a concert in a nearby crime-filled city when she lives so far away from said family member.

So, I begged God to calm my stomach and took the train to the large, crime-filled city all by my lonesome. I was freaked out at first because the train system in this large, crime-filled city is confusing and cumbersome. Normally I have my logical husband there to look clueless figure things out with me. I was on my own this time. As usual, I figured out the cumbersome steps easily enough.

Once I got on the train, a new flood of worries swept through me. Where do I sit? What is the proper etiquette? How many rows should I keep between me and the person in front of me? Is it more acceptable to choose the side of the train that has three seat in a row or two? Do I leave my orange ticket on the seat when I leave, or do I take it with me? Is it weird to tell the conductor "thanks" when he punches my ticket? Are the others around me going to think I'm reading my book too slowly? Should I keep my purse on my lap, or put it next to me? Is it weird to lean my head against the window? Is this designated as a quiet car? Are you allowed to text on a quiet car? Should I answer my cell phone? Do I stand up before the train stops so they know I'm getting off?

Those are only some of the questions that were whirring through my brain on my hour-long train ride. I'm obsessed with what others think of me. That's why I need God to calm my stomach.

Even though I was in a mild state of panic most of the trip, I did take time to enjoy the ride...somewhat. I've always harbored this secret desire to have a fancy cubicle job in a big city that involved a long commute on some sort of public transportation. I've always wanted to be able to read a cool classic novel while riding public transportation. So, I brought A Tale of Two Cities to read along the way. I felt so literate. The thought did cross my mind that I could get used to this sort of life. Maybe I'll have to apply to teach in the public school system of this crime-filled city. Or not. My prayers would be more along the lines of "God, please help me disarm my student without the gun going off."

Anyways, the concert was great. The train ride was great. The feeling of accomplishment when I pulled into my driveway was great. God calmed my stomach as usual. I am safe at home watching episodes of Monk. Monk reminds me a little of myself. Maybe that's why I like the show so much. What he needs is some quality nouthetic counseling, as my husband would say. Or maybe he should just ask God to calm his stomach.